My other family

So my definition of family is "people whom you love and whom love you" pretty much. It's so much more than who you are 'related' to, ya know? Anyways, I have always considered Matt's (Bourbon's dad) family, my family. They welcomed me with open arms when I met them, and even when Matt & I split up, they always treated me like family. Matt was never a family person, and he hated holidays and celebrations (I KNOW! How we ever found eachother, I will never know since I am like the queen of holidays and celebrations!) so I took it upon myself to take Bourbon to all family functions after we split. I was the one at all the birthday parties, every christmas, every holiday. Had I not taken him, they would have never been a part of Bourbon's early life since Matt wasn't going to do it. I watched these kids grow up, I mean Bourbon is 10 now, that's 10 years I have known and loved this family. Even after I got together with Alan, and had Roman, they treated Roman like he was one of the grandkids, and welcomed Alan to all functions (although he rarely wanted to attend, not that I can blame him!). They always accepted me and made me feel loved and welcomed. They are my family. Matt got married in 2004, and they had a baby girl, but he still really wasn't all into the family scene. Not only that but they moved to Houston for 2 years shortly thereafter, so I was still the one that attended all of the functions with Bourbon. But they moved back in 2006, and he has gotten better at family functions. And he no longer wanted me to come to Christmas because he wanted to come. Actually in 2005 I went with him & his wife and such (they were in town for Christmas, but still lived in Houston), and I didn't have a problem with that. I like his wife, I try to be as nice as I can to her; I send her mother's day cards from Bourbon and tell her how grateful I am that he has such a wonderful step-mom, etc. But she has never warmed up to me, and I can see how it could be uncomfortable for her. But that was the last christmas I was at. He asked them to not have me there, and of course on many levels I understand; it is his family and of course they want him to be there. But of course there's also that emotional side of me that thinks "But your my family, I am the one that brought Bourbon all these years, where was he?" of course I would never say that to them. I just sucked it up, skipped christmas and went out to see them at other times, which just meant that I didn't get to see all of the cousins and extended family that I pretty much only got to see at christmas. But it got less and less frequent. I'm just busy, and they are busy. Life. But then they just stopped returning my calls and such. I would call and leave a message asking if I could come out, and nothing. They didn't show up at birthday parties any longer. I was heartbroken. I assumed they were just trying to phase me out, because Matt is around and participating and it just made it easier to not have me around. Which again part of me understands, and part of me doesn't. I started just mailing them cards and gifts for holidays and birthdays and such. I hadn't seen Matt's nephews (all of whom I absolutely adore) in about 2 years. And it had actually been almost a year since I had even seen his dad and step-mom. But I didn't get around to getting his dad's birthday gift in time to get it into the mail (his birthday is sunday), and this is Matt's weekend for Bourbon so I just asked if he was going out there, thinking i would just send it with him, but he said no. So I called last night and Mimi (we call them Mimi & Papa) answered and said to just come on out today. Our Duncan birthday was cancelled, so we actually would be able to. So at about 7pm tonight Roman, Starla & I went out there. And at first it was just mimi & papa, which was all I expected it to be. But then Mimi's son & daughter-in-law called and she told them to come by and say hi to me, they have a 1 year old boy I had never even met (I went to the baby shower, and that was the last time I saw them!)So they came over with their son and daughter and we got to visit. Then Matt's sister-in-law called and Mimi told them to come over and say hi too, so she came over with her 3 boys (the nephews I haven't seen in so long!) and we got to visit! And then Papa's dad, Grandpa Joe stopped by! So we stayed out there for a little over 2 hours,getting to visit everyone! I was so excited! I didn't expect to see everyone! And although all the kids were so much bigger, it was like I had never NOT been there, ya know? It was just like seeing family that you haven't seen in a while. Starla & Roman had a blast playing with all the kids. Of course Starla showed off to everyone and sang and counted in spanish and all of her little tricks. :) It just made me really happy to see everyone. I love them. They are my 'other' family.


Mimi & Papa, and some of the nephews




Max holding baby Sam! Max is the cutest kid, and Sam is adorable!!



Kelsey, Drew, Peyton & Laci. How I've missed them all!!



So tonight I got an unexpected gift as I delivered a birthday gift. :)

Bourbon always tells me how Matt doesn't like me going out to see his family, and how it is HIS family and not mine. And my reply is always that Matt has no right to tell me who I can love and who I can't. That I love that family, so to me they are my family. And didn't Bourbon think it was silly that Matt couldn't share the people that we both loved? Family is who you love, and who loves you.